For a long time I was very unhappy. I mean VERY unhappy. I don't like it when people say stuff like that because it sounds so whiny. But I'm not feeling sorry anymore. I am so happy now. Like REALLY happy. I love my life a LOT. I stopped wondering why some people's life seemed to be free of the troubles that plagued mine. One day I realized that they weren't as trouble free as I thought. There is pain and suffering everywhere. But there is happiness, beauty, love, friendship, and charity everywhere also. To be happy is a simple attention shift.

Yesterday I read a post by another blogger. It was basically an outline of the things that were so spectacular about her life at the moment. I liked the idea so much I had to do it to. So...

Reasons that I love my life right now include St. Tropez and the amazing smell that accompanies it, a really cheap bottle of Acqua Di Gio I found on eBay, a great circle of friend's and family, a healthy body, a great job, fiscal freedom, a religion that answers the questions I have about life, great music, AVATAR: THE LAST AIRBENDER, my boss's really cute puppy, an impending audition, and soooo many other things including this picture:
I love everything about it. It's from the Sartorialist, one of my most favorite blogs. I am dying for shoes like his.
Anyway, not much else to say. Just had to let some of my happiness spill out. <3
What do you love about your life right now? What's that thing right now that just makes you want to jump for joy?

Hugs and warm puppies, Max

Lately something has been nagging at my thoughts. I have been trying to get more organized. I've been revisiting things that I seemed to have forgotten lately. (Nanowrimo.) Things like regular room cleaning, daily showering, and more precisely, journaling. I've always liked journaling. I stuck with it for a very long time. I love how it helps you organize your thoughts and work out problems without even meaning to. But there has always been one aspect of the journaling scene that I have been not so good at. To incorporate journaling into your daily routine, you really have to...write. This doesn't sound very difficult, being born in the techno generation, my handwriting isn't what it should be. And my handwriting speed is DEFINITELY not what it should be. My habit really died at scout camp. After a long, long day at camp, when your head hits the hay, the last thing on your mind is putting pen to paper. The nights that I actually did ink those pages, what I wrote was hardly legible. I lost hope.
But never fear! I resolved this problem this week. Now I'm sure that NONE of you have thought of this so I decided to share. Brace yourselves.
Google Docs. I know. None of you had ever even thought of this. It takes a great mind. It's so simple that I can't believe I never thought of it. Journaling had always been frustrating because my thoughts happened so much faster than I could put them down on paper. But with my (above average) typing speed, journaling has become almost convenient.
For those of you who don't know what Google Docs are, they are simply an online document that you can find under the More tab on the Google home page. If you have a Google account than opening one is effortless. The document saves itself to the web as you type so even if your computer dies mid sentence, your thoughts are saved. Or if a comet flew through your ceiling, narrowly missing your head and fingers but devistating your beloved computer. Considering the fact that if the afore mentioned comet found contact with your leather bound journal, the afore mentioned journal would be toast, we can see which is the more reasonable option.
I encourage you to try it. Creating a Google Doc takes seconds. The benefits are numerous. It is way faster to type your journal. If your house burns down, gets swept away in a typhoon, or is bandited by bandits, your journal will still be safely stored on the interweb.
Your welcome for this knowledge. Use it wisely.

I know I've been ranting on a lot about resolutions, so I hope this won't sound redundant. But I felt like I should share this with you guys and hopefully it will touch one of your hearts.
I'm in my third week of keeping my exercise routine resolution. Supposedly after three weeks your actions become a habit and I can already see my attitude towards fitness changing. I don't have to force myself to do it so much anymore. I like doing it. The thought came to me the other day that if we can change our habits in such a short period of time, would the same work for our attitude? If we thought only happy and uplifting thoughts for a certain amount of time, would our personality change? Is it possible to change our outlook on life by a mental effort?
Following this train of thought, I thought about how many people are struggling in life. So often I have heard (often out of my own mouth) "I don't know how much longer I can do this." or "I just can't take it any more." There are so many people who feel like they are just going to collapse under the burden that they have to carry. If you have a struggle you are trying to deal with and you feel like you can't take it any more, think about your heart like a muscle. If we deal with this sadness for long enough, it will become easier for us. We will be able to bear more and more of the sadness until we can't even feel it anymore and all we can feel is happiness.
If your having a hard time, just know that there are people that love you and that your pain will get easier the more you deal with it. Just don't give up! Fight the fight and if you fall, get right back up again.
<3 Max

I've been thinking a lot about resolutions lately. I've made quite a few this year and everybody knows how hard they are to keep. But I heard a great quote sums up what I think about keeping resolutions. It said something like "Just because we forget to brush our teeth one day, doesn't mean that we'll never brush them again." It's so true. So many people think that because we fall off of the wagon that's taking us to the place we want to go, that we are totally left behind. It's not true! If you screw up your resolution, start it again the next day like nothing ever happened. You are an amazing person for even trying to change in the first place! I've had a resolution not to eat sugar except for the weekends because it makes my eczema go crazy and the person I want to be doesn't have scabby skin. I ate some (delicious) carrot cake tonight. And, though it was decadent, I feel bad. But that doesn't mean I'm going to drop my resolution. And neither should you. You are such a powerful person I know you can do anything you put your mind to. Don't get discouraged. Don't let other people tear you down. Get right back up! I encourage everyone to try their resolution for three weeks. I've heard this is the time it takes to form or break a habit. At least try it for that long and I promise that the satisfaction will be worth all your hard work. Once you change something better in yourself, when you look back it will be like you can't even beleive you didn't do it before. Don't be afraid to sweat towards the person you want to be. It will always be worth it.

I haven't posted in so long and I know I always say that and I always apologize, but an absence of this magnitude warrants an apology.
In retrospect, 2010 was a rough year chuck full of self discovery. There are some things that you can't find out about yourself and blog about at the same time. But (not that I have everything figured out) I wanted to share some things I learned this year. Plus, I love blogging. In the early dawn light of 2011 I decided it was time to pick it up again, so I Googled my way through a blog revamp and here we are. Snazzy, no?
I wanted to post my new year's resolutions before the first of the year was a thing of a past. But I don't want to rush through into the new year with out giving respect to the old one... because 2010 was awesome. I learned some incredibly valuable things last year. Such as:
1. Just because other people have fun doing things, doesn't make them fun for you. Strangely enough I had to be taught this by a book called the Happiness Project. Once you make this self discovery, it seems so obvious, but it is fabulous to know. Just because other people like parties, doesn't make them any less painful for me. Just because others want to grow up and make a living in dentistry, doesn't make it any less disgusting to me.
2. Is similar to one, but just as important. Don't belittle the things that you do love to do just because you don't think that it is right for you. Namely: I love to sing, something I never did because it just wasn't was normal people did. I love to swim, something I never explored because it was for 'fit' people, something I had never classified myself as. And I never spoke my mind about things, because I thought that no one wanted to hear what I had to say. I've come to realize that what other people think doesn't effect me. We have to do us and the friends that we are truly need to have will appear.

Although it might be difficult, I'm determined to make 2011 even better than 2010. So without further adieu, my New Year's Resolutions:
1. Exercise at least five days a week. I've always told myself (or been told by others) that I was 'to thin', had no muscle and would never pull out of my condition because of my Vegetarian life style. These past few months, however, something changed. I realized that the only thing keeping me exactly the way I am, was me. Nothing other people said changed me, but if I internalized their words, then I would never accomplish my dreams. I've come to realize that I've spent to much time dreaming about the person I will be when I grow up and not enough time becoming that person. I am fit in my heart, so this year I will become it on the outside too. If the person you see in the mirror is not what you see in your head, never change your self perception to match a lesser version of yourself. This will only hurt you. Always raise the bar and make yourself better.

2. Get over my fear of singing in public. I love to sing. I love it so much I don't even realize I love it. I sing non stop, even if it's not always out loud. This year I will let my passion take form. I want to share my love with others that appreciate it as much as I do. This year I am going to audition for a major theater where I live. If I get in I will be singing on stage six days a week. Not something you can do if you're afraid to belt Happy Birthday to a friend.

3. I will regret less. Working to change the future is not the same as regretting the past, yet it takes up the same amount of energy. This year I will think only of the positive things that I and others do. I will use my energy to love others and see the incredible bounty that God has given me. I will try to take for granted less and appreciate my blessings more.

I hope you will continue to read my blog. Leave me a comment and tell me what you think. I hope you have the happiest new year of your life.

<3 Max